Episode 249

Let’s begin by understanding that while we can have our averages… average supply that moms have, average time it takes a baby to get a good feeding, average weight gain, average feeding frequency, there are also variables in all these areas.

Each women has a different breast storage capacity. You know I like to enjoy life and have a good sense of humor about all things breastfeeding. Well, my favorite thing to say is that all moms are “holding” a different amount of milk in their breasts. This differs from feeding to feeding and even differs from the right breast to the left breast. Yes, it’s true. I know a lot of moms go into their breastfeeding experience assuming that their right and left breast will make the same amount….. this is so not true for many of us.

We have different volumes of milk that we hold in each breast. Guess what else is different. Your baby. Two adults live in the same household and are served the same amount of food. It is likely that one is going to be a slower eater than the other. It is likely one will take 15 minutes to finish their meal and the other will take 25 minutes. If you are like most people, there will be some feedings during the day that you are hungrier and will eat more than at other times of the day.

Me? Well, I am not so hungry in the earlier part of the day and have to make myself eat breakfast. Near the end of the day is when I seem to be the hungriest. If I am eating more food, it will also take me longer to finish my meal.

Think about this for a minute – If each of your breasts make a different amount and your baby does not have the exact feeding behavior as your friends baby who lives across the street, doesn’t it stand to reason that each baby will take a different amount of time to feed, until they are full. Why on earth do we expect each baby to finish a feeding in exactly the same amount of time?

We know that when the milk is removed frequently and efficiently, moms tend to build a very good supply. We know that when the baby gets free range of time at the breast, the baby tends to control the volume of milk a mom makes.

Now let’s think about the mom who times her baby at the breast. If her baby is still feeding effectively, is alert and interested and sucking and swallowing and the mom removes her baby at the breast after 10 minutes, she is likely stopping her baby from having a full feeding.

It is like someone is taking away your plate of food just because you have been at it for 10 minutes. Sorry you… it doesn’t matter if you were eating a slower pace, it doesn’t matter if you want more… sorry, tough luck. that’s all you get to eat.

If you are watching the clock and this is your focus, can you see how it will be difficult for you to build a supply to meet your babies needs. Can you see how it will be hard for your baby to get a full belly each feeding? Can you see how your baby will not gain weight appropriately? You are letting the clock dictate how much your baby gets.

Big Problem: Your baby cannot tell time. Does not know he needs to hurry up and eat. And even if he does know that he needs to hurry he can only eat so fast. if someone told you to rush to eat your meal, you might be able to eat a little faster, but honestly how much faster can you chew and swallow?

Ask yourself? How happy will you be if someone timed your feeding and took away your food at a specified time? I have a feeling you will be pretty angry. Very frustrated. probably kick and scream.

Babies whose food is taken away from them if they do not have a full belly. Well, they will be pretty upset. Lots of new parents that I work with, mistake this for colic or fussy or gassy or perhaps they need a diaper change. Pacifiers are often given in this case because parents don’t know what else to do to stop their baby from crying?

Parents who are timing their babies – I have asked? have you tried offering the breast again? No, they don’t. Because when you are new at this and have been told and are trained to only give the feeding 10 mintes worth – you don’t want to teach your child to use you as a pacifer? You don’t want to overfeed your baby. These are all the things you have been told and you are trying your best to follow the rules and be a good parent.

Well, I am here to tell you that these rules are wrong. They are stupid..and as I said in the beginning of the show they are harmful. Why? Because frequently this kind of behavior, watching the clock – limits your babies intake and limits your bodies ability to make enough for your baby. And all because you were timing your baby at the breast.

What are you supposed to do, if you are not watching the clock? Well, watch your baby, of course! I would love for you to spend time trying to figure out what your babies behavior is trying to tell you. Pay close attention and you will get better at recognizing the signs that your baby is hungry, you will begin recognzing when they are getting close to being finished with a side at the breast. Give yourself a little time to watch over your baby and you will get pretty good at figuring out of they have had enough food. Instead of taking the baby off when the clock or your app tells you they have been feeding for 10 minutes, try not taking your baby off, when your baby has slowed down to hardly any sucking activity or falls asleep at the breast. These are common signs that your baby is done. Avoid taking them off in the middle of the feeding, just because the clock tells you its time. Remember how you would feel if someone whips away your plate of food just because they think you have been at it long enough.